What Are You Feeding Yourself? Stress, Nourishment and Your Nervous System in Perimenopause and Menopause
This is Part Two of a three-part mini-series where I'm going deep on each of the five pillars of my personal 2026 wellness plan. If you haven't read Part One on Movement and Sleep yet, I'd love for you to start there — there's some really rich context in that piece that will add to what we cover today. This week we're exploring Pillars Three and Four: Stress and Nourishment. I paired these two deliberately, because they are asking the same foundational question. And once you hear the thread that connects them, I think it might change the way you think about both.
Why Stress Hits So Differently Right Now
I want to start by asking you something. When did you last feel genuinely, deeply calm? Not just not busy. Not just sitting down for five minutes between things. Actually calm — in your body, in your nervous system, in the space behind your eyes.
If that question lands with a quiet ache, I want you to know: that is not you doing it wrong. That is biology.
Oestrogen has a regulatory relationship with cortisol, your primary stress hormone. When oestrogen is stable and present, it helps keep your stress response proportionate. As oestrogen fluctuates and declines during perimenopause and menopause, that buffering effect reduces. Your nervous system becomes more reactive. Things you once navigated with relative ease can now feel enormous. You are genuinely working harder to manage the same load.
Understanding this removes so much of the shame and self-blame. You are not weak. You are not falling apart. Your system is under a genuinely increased load, and it is responding accordingly. The question worth sitting with is — what can you do to reduce that load?
What You're Letting In: Energetic Consumption
We talk a lot about what we eat. We talk much less about what we consume in every other sense. And yet the news you read, the social media you scroll, the television you watch, the conversations you find yourself in, the relationships that drain you without ever quite filling you back up — all of it is input. All of it lands in your nervous system.
I have become very intentional — and honestly, quite protective — about what I allow into my energetic field. News and current affairs. Social media accounts and platforms. Distressing content on television. And yes, certain relationships and conversations that consistently leave me feeling depleted.
That last one can be the hardest to name. Because we're conditioned to be available, to be accommodating, to not rock the boat. But a nervous system that is already stretched cannot afford to lose energy through connections that take without replenishing. That is not unkind. It is honest.
I'm not suggesting you disengage from the world. What I am suggesting is that you get curious. What do you feel like after twenty minutes of scrolling? What do you feel like after an hour of distressing news? What do you feel like after a conversation with that particular person? Your nervous system will tell you. The tightness in your chest, the heaviness in your body, the way your shoulders end up around your ears — that's data. Start paying attention to it.
Small Anchors That Make a Real Difference
We tend to imagine regulation as one big practice we do once or twice a day. A morning meditation. A yoga class. A long walk. And those things are wonderful. But what I've found is that small, consistent anchors scattered throughout the day do something a single big practice simply cannot — they interrupt the accumulation of stress before it reaches a tipping point.
For me, regulation happens multiple times through the day. Not in elaborate ways — in small, intentional ones. A few conscious breaths before I open my laptop in the morning. A moment of stillness before I move from one task to another. A hand on my heart when I notice my system starting to ramp up. Stepping outside for five minutes and actually feeling the air on my skin.
These are not impressive practices. They are not Instagram-worthy. But they work, because they keep bringing me back to my body before I lose the thread entirely. Your nervous system is constantly scanning for safety. Your regulation practices — however small — are signals of safety you are sending to your own system throughout the day. You are saying: right now, in this moment, you can rest. And over time, with repetition, that builds something real.
You don't need to overhaul your life. You just need a few anchors. And the willingness to use them.
Nourishment Is Bigger Than Food
Here's the thread I promised you. Stress is about what you're letting in. Nourishment is also about what you're letting in. The question underneath both pillars is the same one: what are you feeding yourself?
True nourishment is anything that sustains you. Anything that fills you up rather than depletes you. Anything that feeds not just your body but your mind, your spirit, your sense of joy and aliveness.
When did you last do something purely because it brought you joy? Not because it was productive. Not because it benefited anyone else. Just because it lit something up in you. By the time we reach midlife, that question can be surprisingly hard to answer. We've spent so many years nourishing everyone else that we've quietly forgotten what nourishes us.
Joy is not a luxury you earn after everything else is done. Joy is a nutrient. And if you're running low on it, your body knows. The things that fill your wellspring will be unique to you — a conversation that leaves you feeling truly seen, time in nature, creative expression, music, stillness, laughter that comes from somewhere deep. These are not indulgences. They are fuel.
Food, Inflammation and What's Actually on My Plate
The food piece matters, especially in this season of life. For me, the shift was away from thinking about food in terms of weight or restriction, and toward thinking about it in terms of inflammation. Lupus is an inflammatory condition. Perimenopause and menopause increase inflammatory markers in the body. Once I understood that what I put on my plate every day either contributed to that inflammation or helped counter it, the choices became clearer.
Anti-inflammatory eating isn't a rigid diet. It's an orientation. It's moving toward whole, unprocessed food as the foundation — vegetables, fruits, legumes, whole grains, good fats, quality protein. And moving away from the things that reliably drive up inflammation — highly processed foods and excess sugar that leave your system inflamed and fatigued rather than sustained and energised.
One of the changes I've genuinely loved is making space for a few vegetarian meals throughout my week. Not as a rule, not as a restriction — just as an intentional choice that has expanded my repertoire and introduced me to some really beautiful, nourishing food. There's real pleasure in discovering how satisfying a meal built around legumes, vegetables and good spices can be.
I also want to say a word about hydration, because it's consistently underestimated. Oestrogen decline affects your body's ability to retain moisture. Dehydration in this season can amplify fatigue, brain fog, headaches and joint pain in ways that are really significant. And alongside plain water, it's worth paying attention to electrolytes — minerals like sodium, potassium and magnesium that play a critical role in how your cells actually use the fluid you're drinking. Eating a varied, mineral-rich diet — leafy greens, avocado, nuts, seeds, good quality salt — covers a lot of ground here.
And through all of it, please release the pressure to eat perfectly. Nourishment built on rigidity and self-punishment isn't nourishment. It's just a different flavour of stress.
A Gentle Invitation
If this series is resonating and you'd love to explore this work in community, the Luminous Women's Circle is happening in Numurkah on the 21st of June. It's a beautiful, intimate space and spots are limited. I would love to see you there.
Or save 10% with a bundle of six circles here
And if Season of Her™ has been on your radar — where we go deep on all of this, including the nervous system work and Polyvagal Theory framework — the waitlist is open now.
You don't need to do this alone. And you don't need to have it all figured out before you begin. You just need to be willing to ask the question: what am I feeding myself? And to start answering it with a little more honesty, and a lot more care.
